Do Smurfs Lay Eggs or Do They Give Birth? – A detailed analysis
Posted on Thursday, June 12th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Filed under: Detailed Analysis, General Talk, Nerd Talk, The World of Awesome, WTF, Women Are Bad News
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How do Smurfs reproduce? This is a fundamental question that a couple of us were discussing. Do Smurfs give birth or do they lay eggs? Or, like other people have suggested, are Smurfs asexual? Here is a brief analysis of all three possibilities.
The case for Laying Eggs :
Well, Smurfette is the only female Smurf in the entire village of Smurfs. Therefore, some have assumed that the Village of Smurfs is like a beehive and that Smurfette is the Queen Bee. In a beehive, The Queen Bee’s sole function is to serve as the reproducer. She lays thousands of eggs that become new bees. This would make Smurfette the mother of all the Smurfs. Then, this would also mean that Papa Smurf is the father of every Smurfs in the village since he would be the one that fertilizes her eggs. However, this theory cannot be true for one simple reason: All the Smurfs in Smurf village are in love with Smurfette.. In the romantic sense! According to this theory, all the Smurfs are in love with their own mother!! To analyze this theory even further reveals that, since Smurfette is the mother of ALL the male Smurfs in the village, then Smurfette is also the mother of Papa Smurf! It’s just too weird..
The case for Giving Birth :
The entire village of Smurfs consists of many male Smurfs and only one female Smurf. Every male Smurf in the village is in love with Smurfette.The male Smurfs are constantly fighting to get Smurfette’s attention. Then there is the question of Papa Smurf. He seems to be like the leader of the pack or the alpha male. The assumption is that all the male Smurfs fight it out (to the death!) to see who is the strongest Smurf. The strongest Smurf becomes Papa Smurf and mates with Smurfette every night and new Smurfs are added to Smurf village daily. The loser Smurf is killed. This theory assumes that Smurfette can get pregnant and give birth rapidly. This theory also assumes that baby Smurfs grow up very quickly. So Papa Smurf and Smurfette can get it on every night and a new Male Smurf is added to the village every day. Obviously, this is my favorite theory since there are no flaws with this theory. The only issue with this theory is: why is Papa smurf dressed in red and why does he look older than the other smurfs?
The case for asexual reproduction :
Some people on the Internet have suggested that Smurfs Reproduce Assexually. Natalie had the following asexual reproduction theory for the Smurfs:
“There has been a great deal of speculation regarding the fact that Smurfette is the only female Smurf in the entire village. People automatically assume that Smurfette is responsible for the propagation of the entire Smurf population. This is an erroneous assumption, because this theory postulates that Smurfs reproduce sexually. I offer forth the idea that Smurfs reproduce asexually, much like amoebas. I believe that when a Smurf takes off his little white hat, the hat grows a new Smurf, and the old Smurf grows a new hat. In the case of Smurfette, well, there is at least one obviously homosexual Smurf in the village (that being Vanity), so why not two? I submit the idea that Smurfette is simply a cross-dressing male Smurf, and there are no real females in the village. No real female acts that over-the-top feminine. I have converted many unbelievers to this theory, based on the simple logic that it puts forth.”
Nice theory, Natalie. There is only one problem with your theory: asexual reproduction leads to identical copies! If the Smurfs were asexual, the village would be filled with hundreds of Grumpy Smurfs and hundreds of Papa Smurfs. There would even be hundreds of Smurfettes. Since this is obviously not the case, this theory is not even worth considering.
Conclusion :
We still do not know how the Smurf village gets populated. But Papa Smurf and Smurfette getting it on every night seems to be the best theory that we’ve got. All hail Papa Smurf!
14 Review for the Do Smurfs Lay Eggs or Do They Give Birth? – A detailed analysis
Smurfette was created by an alchemist. She wasn’t even around when all the smurfs were “born” (whatever). Any theory that involves her is erroneous.
The new movie looks cool.
I thought of another possibility. In the animal kingdom, most males have a much more evolved panache than the females. Perhaps Smurfette is the only male and the remaining smurfs are female, thus live birth is once again a viable option.
All these theories are flawed because they assume that smurfs never die. smurfs just continue multiplying like rabbits. If that were the case, there would be millions of smurfs to take out gargamel
My theory is that Smurfs are somewhat related to Dwarfs. As everyone knows, Dwarf females look almost exactly like Dwarf males. So some of the Smurfs are male, while others are female. And they get jiggy whenever they want.
Ok jedi luke. You have just proven my point. None of these other theories address the fact that there needs to be a control mechanism for the Smurfs. The only theory that deals with Smurf population control is my winning theory. The theory states that there is a fight to the death!! everyday to determine who will be Papa Smurf. The winner becomes Papa Smurf and the loser is killed. Then Papa Smurf mates with Smurfette that night and a new Smurf is born to replace the Smurf that was killed. I should it the balance theory…
Take that, Spider Bitch!
Maybe they’re remarkably infertile. So the number of births is so low that natural accidents keeps the population in check. Then my dwarf theory starts looking good.
you know what? If you really were fans of the smurfs, then you would know that new smurfs actually came by way of a stork.
no your conclusion is flawed because in some of the newer episodes there is a baby smurf they carry around, so if they grow up fast how come that baby is still in fact a baby weeks later?
Well maybe the baby smurf is actually a midget smurf. And if he happened to be a mentally challenged midget smurf, then my theory would still stand…
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It’s obvious that baby smurfs are delivered by the stork, probably on orders from Mother Nature…who creats them in some mystical mother nature way! Baby smurfs grow to little smurflings (remeber snappy, sassett, nat…and puppy?) You never see them grow up due to the simple fact that THEIR WERE NEVER ENOUGH EPISODES!!! If they keep the series going then maybe we would see these little smurfs grow up and more little smurfs pop up on Blue Moon nights!
Ummm there are 3 girls in the smurfs, nana smurf, smurfette, and sassette smurfling! soooo yea….
my best friend suggested tht one day a year they all gang bang smurfette……
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Hey Spider Bitch, you suck!!! This analysis is based on the fact that Smurfette is a Smurf like any other Smurf. if you don’t like it, you suck!